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Author Topic: Raccoons in the attic  (Read 2861 times)

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Offline Satch

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Raccoons in the attic
« on: December 26, 2016, 09:17:02 PM »
 :gritscoon:

I've known people that hate cats.  Hatred so strong that they swerve cars to kill cats.  I've never understood that sort of hatred for an animal until I got raccoons in my attic.
Can anyone recommend a service to remove raccoons, in the NWA area?
I've been able to live trap one of the fuckers, but I think that may have been the child.  The remaining bastard is avoiding every effort to get him trapped. 
It's gone on long enough that the cost of paying for removal is going to be less that the eventual damage to the house.

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Offline Clark

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Re: Raccoons in the attic
« Reply #1 on: December 26, 2016, 09:25:50 PM »
Get a section of railroad tie. Drill out a 1.5in hole. Cut a small piece of tin that will fit into the bottom of the hole. Put tin in a the hole.  Hammer a few nails evenly spaced out and at an angle into where the raccoon can reach his open hand to grab the tin, but close enough that he can't pull out the tin with a balled up fist.

He won't let go until you kill him. May need to put a light on the tin to make it shine. I'd use 1/2 a tie. Heavy. Can also use food.

Coincidentally, that's how my wife trapped me using a hole, nails, and a beer.

« Last Edit: December 26, 2016, 09:29:56 PM by Clark »
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Offline Animal Chin

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Re: Raccoons in the attic
« Reply #2 on: December 26, 2016, 10:02:46 PM »
I have a .300 blackout I can bring over.


Offline Just here for the Italian porn

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Re: Raccoons in the attic
« Reply #3 on: December 28, 2016, 04:53:04 PM »
I hate racoons.   I've never used it, but I've heard from people who have, and read it on the google, that Golden malrin mixed with Mt. Dew will kill coons faster than 2016 kills musicians. 

Should also point out that it is illegal to poison wildlife, FYI. 

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Offline Satch

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Re: Raccoons in the attic
« Reply #4 on: December 28, 2016, 10:01:33 PM »
At this point I'm less worried about legal issues and more concerned with having a dead raccoon somewhere in my attic.

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Offline bogey7

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Re: Raccoons in the attic
« Reply #5 on: December 28, 2016, 10:39:43 PM »
Sweep it out with a broom

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Offline Razor B

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Re: Raccoons in the attic
« Reply #6 on: December 29, 2016, 09:32:19 AM »
Get a section of railroad tie. Drill out a 1.5in hole. Cut a small piece of tin that will fit into the bottom of the hole. Put tin in a the hole. 

I thought this was going to turn into some kind of dick in a box song.


Offline 1st_down_streak

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Re: Raccoons in the attic
« Reply #7 on: December 29, 2016, 09:34:39 AM »
Sweep it out with a broom

This is the most outstanding answer I have ever heard.

No fucks were wasted in the preceding message.

Offline Satch

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Re: Raccoons in the attic
« Reply #8 on: December 29, 2016, 09:54:55 PM »
Sweep it out with a broom
very shallow roof, blown in insulation.  It's a hands and knees situation at best, and long stick and a hook situation to reach the eaves. 
What I'm worried about is the bastard getting into the eaves behind the insulation.  I would basically have to remove insulation until I found the corpse.
That would be days and days of suck, covered in insulation and raccoon shit.

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Offline Veritas Arkansas

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Re: Raccoons in the attic
« Reply #9 on: December 30, 2016, 10:26:19 AM »
very shallow roof, blown in insulation.  It's a hands and knees situation at best, and long stick and a hook situation to reach the eaves. 
What I'm worried about is the bastard getting into the eaves behind the insulation.  I would basically have to remove insulation until I found the corpse.
That would be days and days of suck, covered in insulation and raccoon shit.

Isn't that an average Tuesday night for most woopiggers?


Offline Tusk till Dawn

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Re: Raccoons in the attic
« Reply #10 on: December 31, 2016, 01:20:38 PM »
It sounds like it may come down to some old fashioned hand-to-hand combat. Best of luck, Satch.

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Offline Satch

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Re: Raccoons in the attic
« Reply #11 on: January 01, 2017, 08:52:27 AM »
It sounds like it may come down to some old fashioned hand-to-hand combat. Best of luck, Satch.

Help the raccoon!  I meant help the raccoon, you oversensitive sumbitches.  RAAAACOOON.   :gritscoon:

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Offline Aaron

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Re: Raccoons in the attic
« Reply #12 on: January 01, 2017, 01:40:13 PM »

My kid trapped and skinned this one this morning. Want me to sent him over?






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Offline Satch

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Re: Raccoons in the attic
« Reply #13 on: January 02, 2017, 05:53:37 AM »

It may not have been a raccoon at all.
Woke up this morning and the normal smell was missing.  Checked the trap outside my window and this jack ass was inside.
I'm really hoping this is the one, but I've got a feeling this isn't over just yet.

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Offline mr.zorak

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Re: Raccoons in the attic
« Reply #14 on: January 02, 2017, 07:16:12 AM »
My kid trapped and skinned this one this morning. Want me to sent him over?






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