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Author Topic: Today, my kid...  (Read 48345 times)

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Offline Rick B.

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Re: Today, my kid...
« Reply #100 on: August 22, 2017, 02:07:01 PM »
Last week my 3 year old rode his bike without training wheels, and within the week since he's all over the place.

Not really a big deal, but I wanted to post for some of the parents of youngsters.  Take the training wheels off now.  I wish I had done it for both of my kids from the beginning.  I realize now they make balance bikes for teaching them, but I had already bought 2 bikes and wasn't buying another.  So last week I had an idea.  I took off the training wheels, the pedals, the sprocket, the chain, and lowered the seat as low as it would go.  For the next week he was zooming around with his feet for propulsion.  Every once in a while he'd hit a small downhill and coast and drag his feet.  Make sure you put them in some old beater shoes.  That turned into him lifting his feet off the ground for a bit on the downhills, then even longer the next day, and longer the next.  After about 10 days of doing that everyday, I put the bike back together, raised the seat, and off he went.

My neighbors think I'm a genious, but I feel like the dumbass that's been holding them back for putting training wheels on in the first place.

That's funny.  I look back to when I took the training wheels of my boy's bike.  Don't remember how old he was...probably 4 or so, but I envisioned it being like the movies or TV commercials.  We went from a bike with training wheels, to one without.  Just like that.  Cold turkey, so to speak.  Here I was all anxious and whatnot.  Our street has a gradual downhill slope.  So he got on, coasted down a ways, made a perfect 180 degree turn, pedaled back to me and then just took off.  I'm like...well, shit fire.  So much for that grand and glorious father-son "event".  HA.


Offline Count Porkula

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Re: Today, my kid...
« Reply #101 on: August 22, 2017, 02:45:27 PM »
Thanks. I was a little disappointed in the lack of hookers.

hugh freeze isn't the head corch?

Resonance...metal folding chairs or hard tile floors cannot be beaten when it comes to firing off a loud fart.

Offline Lurking Tiger

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Re: Today, my kid...
« Reply #102 on: August 22, 2017, 06:02:23 PM »
Last week my 3 year old rode his bike without training wheels, and within the week since he's all over the place.

Not really a big deal, but I wanted to post for some of the parents of youngsters.  Take the training wheels off now.  I wish I had done it for both of my kids from the beginning.  I realize now they make balance bikes for teaching them, but I had already bought 2 bikes and wasn't buying another.  So last week I had an idea.  I took off the training wheels, the pedals, the sprocket, the chain, and lowered the seat as low as it would go.  For the next week he was zooming around with his feet for propulsion.  Every once in a while he'd hit a small downhill and coast and drag his feet.  Make sure you put them in some old beater shoes.  That turned into him lifting his feet off the ground for a bit on the downhills, then even longer the next day, and longer the next.  After about 10 days of doing that everyday, I put the bike back together, raised the seat, and off he went.

My neighbors think I'm a genious, but I feel like the dumbass that's been holding them back for putting training wheels on in the first place.

That's actually a good idea. Too late for me though. Maybe I can drop the engine and transmission  out of the car and let my girl Fred Flintstone it for a while.


Offline Count Porkula

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Re: Today, my kid...
« Reply #103 on: August 22, 2017, 06:42:19 PM »
That's actually a good idea. Too late for me though. Maybe I can drop the engine and transmission  out of the car and let my girl Fred Flintstone it for a while.

is your dad a television repair man and does he have an ultimate set of tools?

Resonance...metal folding chairs or hard tile floors cannot be beaten when it comes to firing off a loud fart.

Offline Lurking Tiger

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Re: Today, my kid...
« Reply #104 on: August 23, 2017, 01:34:13 AM »
is your dad a television repair man and does he have an ultimate set of tools?

I can fix it.


Offline PorkRyan

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Re: Today, my kid...
« Reply #105 on: May 19, 2018, 08:25:22 PM »
Today my kid won a state title in baseball for Greenwood.  Two rings in one year.

I got the glory, got the fame, the money, the jewels, the cash, the denali, getting drunk on the reg. Fucking good times on the reg, yachts on the reg, sex on the reg, basically all the shit men fanta

Offline HogofWar

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Re: Today, my kid...
« Reply #106 on: May 19, 2018, 08:33:26 PM »
Today my kid won a state title in baseball for Greenwood.  Two rings in one year.
My dad was at the game at Baum! Congrats!


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Re: Today, my kid...
« Reply #107 on: May 20, 2018, 07:34:17 AM »
Today my kid won a state title in baseball for Greenwood.  Two rings in one year.
Congrats!


Offline Filthy_McSwine

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Re: Today, my kid...
« Reply #108 on: May 20, 2018, 09:29:51 AM »
    :beer:    :thumbup:


Offline CharlieHog

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Re: Today, my kid...
« Reply #109 on: May 21, 2018, 07:33:26 AM »
Today my kid won a state title in baseball for Greenwood.  Two rings in one year.


Congrats! That's very cool.


Offline Rick B.

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Re: Today, my kid...
« Reply #110 on: April 17, 2019, 08:52:04 AM »
Sad for 2 reasons.  Sad that this thread sort of died away.  And sad that my son had another grand mal seizure today.  It's been 2 years and 4 months since his last one.  He's been doing so well.  Taking his meds.  ETC.  Happened in the shower this morning.  Of course, I'm 1100 miles away so my wife had to deal with it all on her own.  Makes me want to punch a fucking wall.  Goddammit.  So frustrating.   About 80% of his seizures have happened while in the shower.  And I keep harping on him NOT to take 20 minute hot showers but he's 17 and that's what they do.  He wants to stay in there and you know, I'm like OK.  We can't keep babying him.   I hope now he will understand that he just needs to get in the shower, wash, and get out.  FUCK.


Offline hogsrunwild

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Today, my kid...
« Reply #111 on: April 17, 2019, 09:50:40 AM »
Get him a fleshlight, for his health.  No joke.

Quote from: Animal Chin on Today at 07:38:32 PM
Also, I want to have sex in and around your mouth. Please tell me you're in central Arkansas so we can meet up.  I'm not hard to find.

Can our Admin change the thread title to Austin Allen's Cock?  If so, then put me down for 10 inches, at least.

Offline Rick B.

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Re: Today, my kid...
« Reply #112 on: April 17, 2019, 09:55:34 AM »
Get him a fleshlight, for his health.  No joke.

Um what?  I know not of which you speak.


Offline gibraltar

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Re: Today, my kid...
« Reply #113 on: April 17, 2019, 11:20:16 AM »
Um what?  I know not of which you speak.
Don't make him explain it. Look it up. Trust me.


Offline gibraltar

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Re: Today, my kid...
« Reply #114 on: April 17, 2019, 11:21:42 AM »
He should be driving now, is this gonna bench him for 9 months?


Offline Rick B.

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Re: Today, my kid...
« Reply #115 on: April 17, 2019, 11:36:37 AM »
He should be driving now, is this gonna bench him for 9 months?
 

1 year.  What a freakin pain that's gonna be.  He's a junior in high school.  He'll hopefully get to drive again just before he graduates high school. 

Don't make him explain it. Look it up. Trust me.

I looked it up but I'm 100% at a loss as to what my son is supposed to do with that.  ???


Offline Trigger7672

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Re: Today, my kid...
« Reply #116 on: April 17, 2019, 11:39:10 AM »
 

1 year.  What a freakin pain that's gonna be.  He's a junior in high school.  He'll hopefully get to drive again just before he graduates high school. 

I looked it up but I'm 100% at a loss as to what my son is supposed to do with that.  ???

He’s supposed to fuck the pocket pussy Rick! Sorry about the seizures, that shit is scary.


Offline goporkyourself

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Re: Today, my kid...
« Reply #117 on: April 17, 2019, 11:40:00 AM »
 


I looked it up but I'm 100% at a loss as to what my son is supposed to do with that.  ???

spend less time in the shower?


Offline Rick B.

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Re: Today, my kid...
« Reply #118 on: April 17, 2019, 11:48:32 AM »
spend less time in the shower?

It looked like a fucking anal probe.  At least what my internet Nazis would let me see on a google search.


Offline hogsrunwild

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Today, my kid...
« Reply #119 on: April 17, 2019, 12:12:27 PM »
 
I looked it up but I'm 100% at a loss as to what my son is supposed to do with that.  ???

Save his life.  If he is taking such long showers to jerk it and it is causing GMS, then get him a fleshlight to use instead.  He can jerk it in his room and supposedly it feels good and easy to clean up.

Anal probe?



You stick your dick in it and fuck it.  Apparently it even provides some suction.  Just need to wash it though. 

« Last Edit: April 17, 2019, 12:31:16 PM by hogsrunwild »
Quote from: Animal Chin on Today at 07:38:32 PM
Also, I want to have sex in and around your mouth. Please tell me you're in central Arkansas so we can meet up.  I'm not hard to find.

Can our Admin change the thread title to Austin Allen's Cock?  If so, then put me down for 10 inches, at least.

Offline Rick B.

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Re: Today, my kid...
« Reply #120 on: April 17, 2019, 12:13:23 PM »
Save his life.  If he is taking such long showers to jerk it and it is causing GMS, then get him a fleshlight to use instead.  He can jerk it in his room and supposedly it feels good and easy to clean up.

Considering he takes a shower in our bathroom and we generally keep an eye on him, he's likely not rubbing anything out in the shower.  But I'll keep that in mind.


Offline Hobo

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Re: Today, my kid...
« Reply #121 on: April 17, 2019, 12:27:11 PM »
My son was selected to be an intern and teach 3D printing and mentor younger kids in engineering at the Arkansas Regional Innovation Hub in NLR.  He's 14 and going into the 9th grade next year. He will be one of the youngest teaching interns ever.   Kid is brilliant.  Not sure where he got it from, I am dumb as a box of rocks.


Offline hogsrunwild

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Re: Today, my kid...
« Reply #122 on: April 17, 2019, 12:32:20 PM »
Considering he takes a shower in our bathroom and we generally keep an eye on him, he's likely not rubbing anything out in the shower.  But I'll keep that in mind.

Wait, now I’m confused.  I thought you were saying he takes such long showers because he is rubbing one out in there.  Why the fuck is he taking such long showers then?

Quote from: Animal Chin on Today at 07:38:32 PM
Also, I want to have sex in and around your mouth. Please tell me you're in central Arkansas so we can meet up.  I'm not hard to find.

Can our Admin change the thread title to Austin Allen's Cock?  If so, then put me down for 10 inches, at least.

Offline Aaron

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Re: Today, my kid...
« Reply #123 on: April 17, 2019, 12:37:05 PM »
Sorry Rick. That sucks. At least he has shown he can go two and a half years without one. That’s good. Hang in there.

Glad all you guys have kids to be proud of. My two have turned into utter shitbirds. 17 and 15 (tomorrow) and they know everything. I cannot for the life of me figure out why. They must get it from their momma. They call me Bruce or Ruce for some reason.




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Offline Rick B.

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Re: Today, my kid...
« Reply #124 on: April 17, 2019, 12:37:50 PM »
Wait, now I’m confused.  I thought you were saying he takes such long showers because he is rubbing one out in there.  Why the fuck is he taking such long showers then?

He's taking long showers because long showers are soothing.  This is what showed up when I googled fleshlight: