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Author Topic: Hogs vs Gumps—-Baseball  (Read 4761 times)

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Offline goporkyourself

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Re: Hogs vs Gumps—-Baseball
« Reply #100 on: May 20, 2022, 08:58:52 PM »
Just dinking shit all over the park.


Offline Show-Me Hog

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Re: Hogs vs Gumps—-Baseball
« Reply #101 on: May 20, 2022, 08:59:51 PM »
Bottom 5th.

Rose gets on 1st somehow while I was taking a piss.  Runner on 1st, 0 out.

Hameater singles to RF on a hit and run.  Runners 1st and 3rd, 0 out.

Pinckney grounds up the middle to Moore, who gets the force at 2nd.  Pinckney safe at 1st on the relay.  Rose scores. 4-2 Hogs. Runner on 1st, 1 out.

Williamson with another seeing eye single. Runners 1st and 3rd, 1 out.

Tamez the Transfer from Arkansas grounds one into LF.  Pinckney scores.  4-3 Hogs.  Runners 1st and 2nd, 1 out.

Dave says fuck this shit.  Pitching change incoming.  Morris in for Noland.

This pitching change brought to you by whoever Connor pissed off to get the kind of luck he had in that inning. 

Wild pitch moves runners up.  Runners 2nd and 3rd, 1 out.  FUCK.

Denton walks.  Bases loaded, 1 out.  Marlboro Light hats engaged for Alabama. 

Seidl bloops one to RF...of course Lanzilli can't make the play.  Run scores from 3rd.  Tied 4-4.  Bases full of NIL money, 1 out.

(Editor's Note:  graduate transferring from Harvard to Alabama has to be like retiring as the scientist who cured cancer and getting a job picking corn out of prisoners' shit with your bare hands.  Or like going from being paid a billion dollars a year to fuck super models to eating Hillary Clinton's ass for minimum wage.)

Diodati singles to RF.  Two Gumps score.  6-4 Alabama.  Runners 1st and 3rd, still just one fucking out.

Jarvis bunts back to the mound...close play at the plate, called safe.  7-4 Alabama.  Runners 1st and 2nd, 1 out.

PITCHING CHANGE:  Zeb in for Morris.

This pitching change brought to you by FireVanHorn.com.  Not really, but god damn this team is frustrating as fuck.

This is going to end up being the longest half-inning report evah. You're going to take up a whole page.


Offline Feral

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Re: Hogs vs Gumps—-Baseball
« Reply #102 on: May 20, 2022, 09:00:05 PM »
To your point, we open a three run lead then promptly give up a half dozen and still going in the bottom of the frame.   

Killer instinct is lacking.
Yep.

I thought maybe, just maybe, after that top of the 5th we might pull away.

Then we get fucking batted around on.


Offline Feral

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Re: Hogs vs Gumps—-Baseball
« Reply #103 on: May 20, 2022, 09:01:46 PM »
This is 9U travel ball shit.

Dropped pop ups, booted balls, getting batted around on, wild pitches, and duffing balls off the mitt. 


Offline Son_of_Spam

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Re: Hogs vs Gumps—-Baseball
« Reply #104 on: May 20, 2022, 09:02:41 PM »
Probably get slammed but where is all this power and pitching we were supposed to have? I thought maybe we started out slow and it would come on but no.

The room looked like the site of some horrible zoological experiment involving whiskey and gorillas....

Offline jdcatty

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Re: Hogs vs Gumps—-Baseball
« Reply #105 on: May 20, 2022, 09:02:54 PM »
I have been watching, but unable to post.  Seems to me like the damn defensive shift cost us badly on at least 4 plays.

Damn Bobby Petrino!!!  What the Hell was he thinking?

Offline Son_of_Spam

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Re: Hogs vs Gumps—-Baseball
« Reply #106 on: May 20, 2022, 09:05:05 PM »
Another freshman pitcher for the Gumps that will probably kick our ass.

The room looked like the site of some horrible zoological experiment involving whiskey and gorillas....

Offline DirkPiggler

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Re: Hogs vs Gumps—-Baseball
« Reply #107 on: May 20, 2022, 09:07:36 PM »
Top 6th.

PITCHING CHANGE:  #27 in for McNairy.

This pitching change brought to you by former McNairy County sheriff Buford Pusser.   

Webb walks strikes out homers looking on a 3-2 count. 1 out.

Stovall grounds out to 3rd. 2 out.

Battles grounds out. 3 out.

Mid 6th.  Cousin Fuckers 7 Bed Shitters 4.





« Last Edit: May 20, 2022, 09:09:15 PM by DirkPiggler »
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Online hogsrunwild

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Re: Hogs vs Gumps—-Baseball
« Reply #108 on: May 20, 2022, 09:07:41 PM »
Either this class and group wasn’t what DVH thought or he was blowing smoke.  They aren’t very good right now and haven’t really clicked all year.

Moore is a disaster and not getting better.  .230 is bad.  Really bad. 

Quote from: Animal Chin on Today at 07:38:32 PM
Also, I want to have sex in and around your mouth. Please tell me you're in central Arkansas so we can meet up.  I'm not hard to find.

Can our Admin change the thread title to Austin Allen's Cock?  If so, then put me down for 10 inches, at least.

Offline HogTat

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Re: Hogs vs Gumps—-Baseball
« Reply #109 on: May 20, 2022, 09:08:19 PM »
And now our bats will turn to icicles.  :suicide:

Yep.  1-2-3

« Last Edit: May 20, 2022, 09:09:58 PM by HogTat »
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Offline Son_of_Spam

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Re: Hogs vs Gumps—-Baseball
« Reply #110 on: May 20, 2022, 09:09:17 PM »
All of our walk up songs should be “Down on Main Street” because that’ s where we watch strike three.

The room looked like the site of some horrible zoological experiment involving whiskey and gorillas....

Offline DirkPiggler

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Re: Hogs vs Gumps—-Baseball
« Reply #111 on: May 20, 2022, 09:10:11 PM »
And now our bats will turn to icicles.  :suicide:

Just think if they have a lefty who can throw over 40 mph...

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Offline jdcatty

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Re: Hogs vs Gumps—-Baseball
« Reply #112 on: May 20, 2022, 09:10:36 PM »
I wonder if they keep stats on how many times a team swings at a ball, but whiffs.  We would surely lead the SEC in that category.

Damn Bobby Petrino!!!  What the Hell was he thinking?

Offline bleedinred

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Re: Hogs vs Gumps—-Baseball
« Reply #113 on: May 20, 2022, 09:11:05 PM »
 Our approach at the plate has been frustrating for about four or five years now.  This year is killing me with all the looking third strikes. When you have two strikes, you’re taught to protect. Anything close. We just sit there and fucking stare at the pitch and then hop around in disgust when it is called a strike.

Riding in seat #1 on the Muss Bus.

Offline DirkPiggler

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Re: Hogs vs Gumps—-Baseball
« Reply #114 on: May 20, 2022, 09:11:45 PM »
Bottom 6th.

Pinckney hits the first pitch to Mobile.  8-4 gumps.  0 out.  So fucking frustrating...

Williamson walks.  Runner on 1st, 0 out.

Tamez grounds out to 3rd.  Runner on 2nd, 1 out.

Denton flies out to Gregory.  Runner on 2nd, 2 outs.

Seidl grounds out to Stovall.  3 outs.

End 6th.  Nothing to play for 8, No one to give a shit 4.







« Last Edit: May 20, 2022, 09:18:52 PM by DirkPiggler »
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Offline Thin Red Swine

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Re: Hogs vs Gumps—-Baseball
« Reply #115 on: May 20, 2022, 09:11:59 PM »
Either this class and group wasn’t what DVH thought or he was blowing smoke.  They aren’t very good right now and haven’t really clicked all year.

Moore is a disaster and not getting better.  .230 is bad.  Really bad.

Wouldn’t be so bad if he had some hard luck outs.   But he has a shit ton of strikeouts.   I would prefer if he never hit another home run because he could have a classic line drive base hitter swing with fairly regular gap power.  He could seriously hit high .300s. 

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Offline DirkPiggler

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Re: Hogs vs Gumps—-Baseball
« Reply #116 on: May 20, 2022, 09:12:41 PM »
Wouldn’t be so bad if he had some hard luck outs.   But he has a shit ton of strikeouts.   I would prefer if he never hit another home run because he could have a classic line drive base hitter swing with fairly regular gap power.  He could seriously hit high .300s.

With the way he's played we'll probably get to see if he can accomplish that next year.

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Offline Son_of_Spam

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Re: Hogs vs Gumps—-Baseball
« Reply #117 on: May 20, 2022, 09:12:46 PM »
Vermillion has done that all year. I have no idea why we keep trotting him out there.

The room looked like the site of some horrible zoological experiment involving whiskey and gorillas....

Offline bleedinred

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Re: Hogs vs Gumps—-Baseball
« Reply #118 on: May 20, 2022, 09:14:23 PM »
Vermillion has been the biggest career disappointment. He has been a huge disappointment.

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Offline DirkPiggler

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Re: Hogs vs Gumps—-Baseball
« Reply #119 on: May 20, 2022, 09:14:56 PM »
Our approach at the plate has been frustrating for about four or five years now.  This year is killing me with all the looking third strikes. When you have two strikes, you’re taught to protect. Anything close. We just sit there and fucking stare at the pitch and then hop around in disgust when it is called a strike.

This.

We act like we have zero awareness of the count.

I like being selective with fewer than two strikes.  But once you get to X-2 count, if it's close you have to put it in play.

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Offline DirkPiggler

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Re: Hogs vs Gumps—-Baseball
« Reply #120 on: May 20, 2022, 09:16:07 PM »
Vermillion has done that all year. I have no idea why we keep trotting him out there.

If not him, who?  Morris already shit the bed.  We don't want to use Tygart or Taylor in a lost cause. 

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Offline Hogwildpigcrazy

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Re: Hogs vs Gumps—-Baseball
« Reply #121 on: May 20, 2022, 09:16:31 PM »
My first ever Razorback baseball game to attend. It’s gone from my bucket list to the fuckit list.

Our founding fathers would have been shooting by now.

Offline Son_of_Spam

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Re: Hogs vs Gumps—-Baseball
« Reply #122 on: May 20, 2022, 09:18:09 PM »
If not him, who?  Morris already shit the bed.  We don't want to use Tygart or Taylor in a lost cause.
No idea, but putting him in is like throwing in the towel. Ramage has been a little better lately. At least for one or two innings.

The room looked like the site of some horrible zoological experiment involving whiskey and gorillas....

Offline DirkPiggler

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Re: Hogs vs Gumps—-Baseball
« Reply #123 on: May 20, 2022, 09:21:41 PM »
Top 7th.

Gregory, who has not been hit by a pitch yet tonight, is hit by a pitch.   Play under review.  Announcers think he Walkered it.  Obviously he didn't, because Birmingham upheld the call.  If it was even close we know that wouldn't have happened.  Runner on 1st, 0 out.

Wallace grounds into what would've been a double play if there had been someone on the right side to cover 2nd base.  Force at 2nd.  Runner on 1st, 1 out.

Turner strikes out allegedly swinging.  Runner on 1st, 2 outs.

Moore bloops one into LF for a single.  Runner on 1st and 2nd, 2 outs.

Lanzilli, who owes us at least two runs, rips one down the line for extra bases.  Wallace and Moore score.  8-6 Alabama.  Runner on 2nd, 2 outs.

PITCHING CHANGE:  They have a lefty coming in. Brock Guffey.  The comeback was fun while it lasted.  FUCK!

This pitching change brought to you by my weekly reminder that people should not be allowed to pitch left-handed in the game of baseball.  This is not a discriminatory policy.  Those who favor their left arm are welcome to pitch...they just have to use the other arm to do it.

Slavens strikes out by taking ball three at his eyes.  Fuck this ump.  3 outs.

Mid 7th.  Them 8 Us 6













« Last Edit: May 20, 2022, 09:35:51 PM by DirkPiggler »
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Offline Thin Red Swine

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Re: Hogs vs Gumps—-Baseball
« Reply #124 on: May 20, 2022, 09:25:37 PM »
Annnnnnnndddddd, right on cue, Wallace hits right into the teeth of the shift. 


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