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Author Topic: SEC Baseball Tournament a.k.a. Monsoon Season a.k.a. Annual Bath Day in Alabama  (Read 5296 times)

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Offline DirkPiggler

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I figure we need a separate thread for our two games in Hoover this week. 

Updated Bracket:

3 Arkansas (us)
11 Cousinfuckers

2 Sheepfuckers
7 Floorda

1 Vitello
8 The Whistler

4 Corndogs
12 Kentucky

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Online Son_of_Spam

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I figure we need a separate thread for our two games in Hoover this week. 

Updated Bracket:

3 Arkansas (us)
11 Cousinfuckers

2 Sheepfuckers
7 Floorda

1 Vitello
8 The Whistler

4 Corndogs
12 Kentucky
2 games? Hopefully.

The room looked like the site of some horrible zoological experiment involving whiskey and gorillas....

Offline DirkPiggler

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Game one starts in about 13 minutes, weather permitting.  First rain delay scheduled for around 6:00 pm CDT.

LINEUPS:

Cousinfuckers:

1. Caden Rose CF
2. William Hammiter DH
3. Andrew Pinckney RF
4. Drew Williamson 1B
5. Dominic Tamez the Transfer from Arkansas C
6. Zane Denton 3B
7. Jim Jarvis SS
8. Tommy Seidl LF
9. Bryce Eblin 2B

P. Jacob McNairy RHP

(Editor's Note:  This is good news.  I had lots of Buford Pusser and DBT Dirty South content that I didn't get to use last weekend)

YOUR ARKANSAS RAZORBACKS

1. Cayden Wallace 3B
2. Brady Slavens DH
3. Chris Lanzilli RF
4. Michael Turner C
5. Robert Moore 2B
6. Braydon Webb CF
7. Peyton Stovall 1B
8. Jalen Battles SS
9. Zack Gregory LF

P.  Will McEntire RHP.

Dave Van Horn is not with the team today, due to "not feeling well."  Make of that what you will.

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Offline Law_Hawg

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Trey Schaap posted on Twitter that there are discussions ongoing about maybe making this a single-elimination tournament.

https://twitter.com/trey1037TheBuzz/status/1529565905356824577

I see that you have made three spelling mistakes.   -Thomas de Mahy, Marquis de Favras, upon reading his death warrant.

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Game one starts in about 13 minutes, weather permitting.  First rain delay scheduled for around 6:00 pm CDT.

LINEUPS:

Cousinfuckers:

1. Caden Rose CF
2. William Hammiter DH
3. Andrew Pinckney RF
4. Drew Williamson 1B
5. Dominic Tamez the Transfer from Arkansas C
6. Zane Denton 3B
7. Jim Jarvis SS
8. Tommy Seidl LF
9. Bryce Eblin 2B

P. Jacob McNairy RHP

(Editor's Note:  This is good news.  I had lots of Buford Pusser and DBT Dirty South content that I didn't get to use last weekend)

YOUR ARKANSAS RAZORBACKS

1. Cayden Wallace 3B
2. Brady Slavens DH
3. Chris Lanzilli RF
4. Michael Turner C
5. Robert Moore 2B
6. Braydon Webb CF
7. Peyton Stovall 1B
8. Jalen Battles SS
9. Zack Gregory LF

P.  Will McEntire RHP.

Dave Van Horn is not with the team today, due to "not feeling well."  Make of that what you will.
A little shocked at McEntire starting.

The room looked like the site of some horrible zoological experiment involving whiskey and gorillas....

Online Son_of_Spam

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Trey Schaap posted on Twitter that there are discussions ongoing about maybe making this a single-elimination tournament.

https://twitter.com/trey1037TheBuzz/status/1529565905356824577
I wish they would move this tourney to Memphis. I can guarantee the crowds would be bigger.

The room looked like the site of some horrible zoological experiment involving whiskey and gorillas....

Offline DirkPiggler

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I wish they would move this tourney to Memphis. I can guarantee the crowds would be bigger.

I wish they would rotate it.  There is nothing wrong with having Hoover in the rotation.  It shouldn't be there every year.  I guarantee you someone in the SEC office (or one of their brothers-in-law) is benefiting financially from having the tourney there.

There are a shit ton of major and minor league parks in this league that would be great host locations periodically.

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Offline DirkPiggler

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Top 1st.

Rose strikes out looking.  Sit down, bitch.  1 out.

Hammiter grounds out to Moore.  2 outs.

Pinckney strikes out swinging, retired 2-3 after the drop.  Sit down, bitch.  3 outs.

Mid 1st.  0 Cousins fucked, Hogs coming up.



« Last Edit: May 25, 2022, 04:36:30 PM by DirkPiggler »
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Offline DirkPiggler

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Bottom 1st.

Wallace flies out to RF. 1 out.

Slavens singles to the 2nd baseman playing in middle RF.  Runner on 1st, 1 out.

Lanzilli grounds into a 6-4-3 double play.  3 outs.

End 1st. 0-0.


« Last Edit: May 25, 2022, 04:42:09 PM by DirkPiggler »
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1 pitch 1 out.

The room looked like the site of some horrible zoological experiment involving whiskey and gorillas....

Offline DirkPiggler

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Top 2nd.

Williamson grounds one back up the middle off McEntire.  Infield hit.  Runner on 1st, 0 out.

Williamson attempts to steal, thrown out by Turner.  1 out.

Tamez the Transfer from Arkansas walks.  Runner on 1st, 1 out.

Denton rips one to RF.  Runners 1st and 2nd, 1 out.

Tommy Shaw lookalike Jarvis walks.  Bases full of cousinfuckers, 1 out.

Seidl grounds into what should have been a double play.  Battles to Moore for the force, Stovall can't scoop the relay. Two cousinfuckers score.  2-0 Alabama.  Runner on 1st, 2 outs.

Eblin grounds out 6-3.  3 outs.

Mid 2nd.  2-0 Cousinfuckers.










« Last Edit: May 25, 2022, 05:00:17 PM by DirkPiggler »
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Fuck this ump.

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Fucking 0-2 count and you run it full fucking around.

The room looked like the site of some horrible zoological experiment involving whiskey and gorillas....

Offline Barton Fink

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This team cannot afford to keep making errors.

<--- I'm with him

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This team cannot afford to keep making errors.
I don’t know how many times our pitching staff has gone to an 0-2 count and either given up a hit or a walk. We never go after the hitter.

The room looked like the site of some horrible zoological experiment involving whiskey and gorillas....

Offline DirkPiggler

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Bottom 2nd.

Turner lines out to SS.  Nice play by Shaw to keep it from being a hit.  1 out.

Moore grounds out to 2nd. 2 outs.

Webb strikes out.  3 outs.

End 2nd.  2-0 Gumps



« Last Edit: May 25, 2022, 05:07:30 PM by DirkPiggler »
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20 pitches for their guy. We are the suck at hitting. But great at swinging and missing.

The room looked like the site of some horrible zoological experiment involving whiskey and gorillas....

Offline DirkPiggler

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Top 3rd.

Rose walks on four pitches, none of which were particularly close.  Runner on 1st, 0 out.

Hammiter strikes out swinging. Sit down, bitch.  Runner on 1st, 1 out.

Rose moves up to 2nd on a wild pitch.  Runner on 2nd, 1 out.

Pinckney strikes out swinging, Turner drops ball, throws to 3rd, gets Rose in a pickle.  Throw to McEntire covering is in time, but tag is poor.  Runners 2nd and 3rd, 1 out. 

PITCHING CHANGE.  Zack Morris in for McEntire.

This pitching change brought to you by the end of the season...coming sooner than we all anticipated...probably no later than Sunday, June 5th.

Williamson pops out in foul ground to Wallace...runner tags from 3rd and scores.  LET THE GOD DAMN BALL DROP !  3-0 Alabama.  Runner on 3rd, 2 outs.

Tamez, who is fucking ecstatic that he transferred from Arkansas, strikes out to mercifully end this shitshow of an inning. 3 outs.

Mid 3rd.  3-0 Alabama.









« Last Edit: May 25, 2022, 05:24:38 PM by DirkPiggler »
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I hope whatever DVH is doing at home, he is at least looking for some hitters for next year. And maybe some pitchers.

The room looked like the site of some horrible zoological experiment involving whiskey and gorillas....

Offline DirkPiggler

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I hope whatever DVH is doing at home, he is at least looking for some hitters for next year. And maybe some pitchers.

If Alabama fires Bohannon after this year I hope we would hire him to replace Thompson.

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If Alabama fires Bohannon after this year I hope we would hire him to replace Thompson.
I think that would be a good move.

The room looked like the site of some horrible zoological experiment involving whiskey and gorillas....

Offline Barton Fink

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Wtf is Turner trying to backhand a breaking ball in the dirt? He's nowhere near as good defensively as Opitz.

<--- I'm with him

Offline Barton Fink

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Yeah, we suck.

<--- I'm with him

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You would think that after having several days off, we would look better.

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Offline hogsrunwild

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Several players have regressed badly this year.  Others were, apparently, just not very good.  Oh well.

Quote from: Animal Chin on Today at 07:38:32 PM
Also, I want to have sex in and around your mouth. Please tell me you're in central Arkansas so we can meet up.  I'm not hard to find.

Can our Admin change the thread title to Austin Allen's Cock?  If so, then put me down for 10 inches, at least.